No matter where I am, who I've become or who I will be, can I wipe my guilt out of my mind? Or, can I really be satified myself at the present status, in the matter of time. There are a lot of sentimental feelings that are playing the wrestle to each other. I love I hate, I feel shame to be proud. It used to be the comparison in the shadow, now it's the ambition to be the ghost. And it's all about oneself, which is me. But all I want to do is make my family proud of me, to have smiles with the joyful tears, say loudly to their surroundings. But the money, those coins and currencies, those worth made by trees and metals, are things people used to judge the universal everything, in this reality. To weight what we need in our life, physically. I don't know since when, things were changed. The spirit after we died with 21 grams, is no longer to be the word. The heart goes with its belonging that is denied by the society, we are locked in the dead lane by the fear, afarid to fly high without the..., insurence.
I don't know what I'm saying, but probably, I want to tell you that, I hope I'm doing the right thing without any harmful effect; and rest of them, I just pray for the god which should be something beyond the life and death, and wish it gives me a praise after these and those to be done, nicely.
PS. to my dear dad, mum, bro and young passed sis; and anyone who is struggling for his/her dream.
I don't know what I'm saying, but probably, I want to tell you that, I hope I'm doing the right thing without any harmful effect; and rest of them, I just pray for the god which should be something beyond the life and death, and wish it gives me a praise after these and those to be done, nicely.
PS. to my dear dad, mum, bro and young passed sis; and anyone who is struggling for his/her dream.
